Comment On Classic WTF: The Complicator's Gloves

Since this is about gloves, I guess "fist" is finally appropriate.

No need for gloves, just heat to the main part of the body:

http://www.freepatentsonline.com/WO2007128129.html

also shouting Fecund! seems to be appropriate for such a fecund discussion

I have to keep telling my proctologist that. Gloves.

Actually, the product already exists. For motorcycles anyway. Heated grips and/or gloves are very popular for riding in the winter, although a good pair of gloves and a wind-blocking shield for the grips usually work well enough.

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

The obligatory practical example of just what happens when you over engineer the humble bicycle:

In the words of the unfailable Strong Bad:

Gloves! G-Get some real gloves!

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

What do you care? You're dead, remember?

Great. Now we have to invent a system to keep the gloves warm. Maybe we could enclose the bicycle in a rigid covering with some glass windows for visibility. You'd need four wheels to stabilize it and maybe a small motor to assist moving the extra mass. Oh! That gives me an idea. We could heat the enclosure with waste heat from the motor, add satellite radio and install some cupholders.

We can call it a car.

What this lacks in practicality, it more than makes up for in awesomeness.

JR:

The obligatory practical example of just what happens when you over engineer the humble bicycle:

What this lacks in practicality, it more than makes up for in awesomeness.

(Now with quotey goodness)

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

I feel like such an idiot for thinking this was such a great idea, up until that last email.

I don't like thick gloves so if its really cold, having heated handlebars would on my bike would be great.
My motorbike will certainly get some eventually.

Having ridden in cold weather, I'd say that regular gloves suck at keeping your hands warm on a bicycle. Battery heated gloves or toasty grips sound pretty good.

I'm going to guess that guy who piped up about gloves was a boss and that was his way of saying get back to work.

Uber:

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The Bahamas cease reflecting sound waves. Now what do you do?

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

Jeff:

Actually, the product already exists. For motorcycles anyway. Heated grips and/or gloves are very popular for riding in the winter, although a good pair of gloves and a wind-blocking shield for the grips usually work well enough.

So those wind blocking shields work? I would like to get something like that for my motorcycle because no, gloves don't really cut it if it's really cold and you're going down the freeway at 60 MPH.

If you want to know who this guy is...he over engineered the bicycle into the segway.

TakeASeatOverThere:

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

You're a vampire. I don't think you have to get too worried about being shot, unless they're shooting wooden stakes. Plus I doubt that the national guard of the Bahamas shoots at every bird imaginable.

Alternately, just turn back into human form and swim the rest of the way.

SomeCoder:

Jeff:

Actually, the product already exists. For motorcycles anyway. Heated grips and/or gloves are very popular for riding in the winter, although a good pair of gloves and a wind-blocking shield for the grips usually work well enough.

So those wind blocking shields work? I would like to get something like that for my motorcycle because no, gloves don't really cut it if it's really cold and you're going down the freeway at 60 MPH.

Problem with gloves: Heat loss from the individual fingers.
Solution: Big Honking Fur-lined Leather Mitts.

Unlike feet on bicycle pedals, hands on handlebars don't do much to encourage blood flow. Reunaud's syndrome exacerbates the situation.

Mitts. Big Honking Fur-lined Leather Mitts. $8/pair at wallymart

bramster:

SomeCoder:

Jeff:

Actually, the product already exists. For motorcycles anyway. Heated grips and/or gloves are very popular for riding in the winter, although a good pair of gloves and a wind-blocking shield for the grips usually work well enough.

So those wind blocking shields work? I would like to get something like that for my motorcycle because no, gloves don't really cut it if it's really cold and you're going down the freeway at 60 MPH.

Problem with gloves: Heat loss from the individual fingers.
Solution: Big Honking Fur-lined Leather Mitts.

Unlike feet on bicycle pedals, hands on handlebars don't do much to encourage blood flow. Reunaud's syndrome exacerbates the situation.

Mitts. Big Honking Fur-lined Leather Mitts. $8/pair at wallymart

Have you ever driven a motorcycle? That's not going to be terribly fun to operate with big mitts on. You still need to have some tactile sense on the grips and operating the throttle, clutch and hand brake with mitts on would be relatively difficult.

I don't even really like using my gloves that much but it's way better than the alternative :)

Two quotes come to mind

1) If the glove doesn't fit you must acquit.
- OJ Simpson Defense lawyer

2) No glove, no love.
- That's what she said.

The point is moot because vampires can't cross running water.

I was going to chime in about gloves being somewhat cumbersome and in some instances suboptimal but I see that someone else has already made that point.

Nonetheless, this reminds me of a discussion I heard on NPR's Car Talk, wherein they pointed out that two guys who know nothing about a subject know less than one guy who knows nothing about a subject. The theory, as I remember it, is as follows:

If you ask one guy about something which he knows nothing, he'll probably just admit it and that will be that.

However, two (or more) guys will start speculating and weaving elaborate scenarios or theories, adding up to considerably less than nothing.

There's probably some X chromosome linkage involved. . .

Anyhow, that's my theory and I'm stickin' to it.

EatenByAGrue:

TakeASeatOverThere:

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

You're a vampire. I don't think you have to get too worried about being shot, unless they're shooting wooden stakes. Plus I doubt that the national guard of the Bahamas shoots at every bird imaginable.

Alternately, just turn back into human form and swim the rest of the way.

The national guard is on high alert for a vampire invasion, are armed with silver bullets, and have orders to fire at will on any flying object. Swimming is not possible because the distance is too far and the sun will rise before reaching shelter.

Now what do you do?

Put it in an Interview 2.0 and I'll tell you my answer. Ah, whoam ah kiddin! Ahm gonna till ya anahwey!

Everyone knows that the warmest place on your body when you're riding a bike is your perineum. Construct a pair of heatpipes in the seat tracing along the frame...

Uber:

EatenByAGrue:

TakeASeatOverThere:

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

You're a vampire. I don't think you have to get too worried about being shot, unless they're shooting wooden stakes. Plus I doubt that the national guard of the Bahamas shoots at every bird imaginable.

Alternately, just turn back into human form and swim the rest of the way.

The national guard is on high alert for a vampire invasion, are armed with silver bullets, and have orders to fire at will on any flying object. Swimming is not possible because the distance is too far and the sun will rise before reaching shelter.

Now what do you do?

Laugh at the national guard for using silver bullets (those are for werewolves, not vampires), turn all the national guard into vampires and take over the world.

I have a very poor circulation, and my hands are almost always cold except when I'm exposed to the direct sunlight for 15+ minutes or I'm keeping my hands close to my body. Winter combined with walking or riding a bike will result in frozen fingers for me no matter how thick my gloves are. Gloves are like a somewhat defective thermos. They help you keep your hands warm, only if they are warm to begin with. If they are icy cold anyway, gloves will not help.

Now if we develop a turbo for the heart which would pump the blood faster...

Uber:

EatenByAGrue:

TakeASeatOverThere:

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

You're a vampire. I don't think you have to get too worried about being shot, unless they're shooting wooden stakes. Plus I doubt that the national guard of the Bahamas shoots at every bird imaginable.

Alternately, just turn back into human form and swim the rest of the way.

The national guard is on high alert for a vampire invasion, are armed with silver bullets, and have orders to fire at will on any flying object. Swimming is not possible because the distance is too far and the sun will rise before reaching shelter.

Now what do you do?

Walk to Florida instead. Take some old people out for drinks.

Steve:

I was going to chime in about gloves being somewhat cumbersome and in some instances suboptimal but I see that someone else has already made that point.

Nonetheless, this reminds me of a discussion I heard on NPR's Car Talk, wherein they pointed out that two guys who know nothing about a subject know less than one guy who knows nothing about a subject. The theory, as I remember it, is as follows:

If you ask one guy about something which he knows nothing, he'll probably just admit it and that will be that.

However, two (or more) guys will start speculating and weaving elaborate scenarios or theories, adding up to considerably less than nothing.

There's probably some X chromosome linkage involved. . .

Anyhow, that's my theory and I'm stickin' to it.

There's more likely Y x 2 chromosome linkage involved, and Click and Clack would be the first to admit it, along with self-administration of dope-slaps.

Amazing: nobody's posted this yet.

Heated Apparel for Motorcycling

Oh... somebody has. How 'bout that.

OK, genius.

What about in the summertime? How do you bike to work without sweating like a pig when you get there.

Answer (at least around these parts): You don't. Unless you can work up a pedal-powered air-conditioner unit and have it be cheap enough in money and in energy usage...

Wayne:

OK, genius.

What about in the summertime? How do you bike to work without sweating like a pig when you get there.

Answer (at least around these parts): You don't. Unless you can work up a pedal-powered air-conditioner unit and have it be cheap enough in money and in energy usage...

Already answered above: enclose on frame with 4 wheel base, add motor for propulsion, add a/c compressor/blower, call it a car.

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

If you can fly, why were you riding a bicycle?

snoofle:

Wayne:

OK, genius.

What about in the summertime? How do you bike to work without sweating like a pig when you get there.

Answer (at least around these parts): You don't. Unless you can work up a pedal-powered air-conditioner unit and have it be cheap enough in money and in energy usage...

Already answered above: enclose on frame with 4 wheel base, add motor for propulsion, add a/c compressor/blower, call it a car.

Your car gets stuck in traffic. Now what do you do?

Wayne:

OK, genius.

What about in the summertime? How do you bike to work without sweating like a pig when you get there.
...
...

answer...

Everyone knows that the warmest place on your body when you're riding a bike is your perineum. Construct a pair of heatpipes in the seat tracing along the frame...

Just run this in reverse through a radiator to lose the heat and cool your perineum

Reminds me of the development of the ballpoint pen with the ink pump so our astronauts could write in zero-g. The Soviets solved the same problem with pencils.

TomatoQueen:

Steve:

There's probably some X chromosome linkage involved. . .

Anyhow, that's my theory and I'm stickin' to it.

There's more likely Y x 2 chromosome linkage involved, and Click and Clack would be the first to admit it, along with self-administration of dope-slaps.

Dang! Please consider a self-adminstered dope-slap delivered. I can't believe made such a boneheaded mistake.

And I work with biologists, too.

Sheesh.

Dink:

Reminds me of the development of the ballpoint pen with the ink pump so our astronauts could write in zero-g. The Soviets solved the same problem with pencils.

Yeah, but what aobut pencil shavings in zero G? You'd need a vacuum attachment on the pencil sharpener to . . .

Alison:

Uber:

EatenByAGrue:

TakeASeatOverThere:

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

You're a vampire. I don't think you have to get too worried about being shot, unless they're shooting wooden stakes. Plus I doubt that the national guard of the Bahamas shoots at every bird imaginable.

Alternately, just turn back into human form and swim the rest of the way.

The national guard is on high alert for a vampire invasion, are armed with silver bullets, and have orders to fire at will on any flying object. Swimming is not possible because the distance is too far and the sun will rise before reaching shelter.

Now what do you do?

Laugh at the national guard for using silver bullets (those are for werewolves, not vampires), turn all the national guard into vampires and take over the world.

Your immortal, took over the world, outlasted everybody, and watched all the movies ever made. You're bored. What do you do now?!

Jorgey Porgey:

Alison:

Uber:

EatenByAGrue:

TakeASeatOverThere:

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

You're a vampire. I don't think you have to get too worried about being shot, unless they're shooting wooden stakes. Plus I doubt that the national guard of the Bahamas shoots at every bird imaginable.

Alternately, just turn back into human form and swim the rest of the way.

The national guard is on high alert for a vampire invasion, are armed with silver bullets, and have orders to fire at will on any flying object. Swimming is not possible because the distance is too far and the sun will rise before reaching shelter.

Now what do you do?

Laugh at the national guard for using silver bullets (those are for werewolves, not vampires), turn all the national guard into vampires and take over the world.

Your immortal, took over the world, outlasted everybody, and watched all the movies ever made. You're bored. What do you do now?!

Explore the universe.

Dink:

Reminds me of the development of the ballpoint pen with the ink pump so our astronauts could write in zero-g. The Soviets solved the same problem with pencils.

So you think re-engineering a whole space vehicle to tolerate the tiny pieces of conductive graphite that a pencil would have relesed is a less complicated idea then designing a pen?

lolwtf:

Jorgey Porgey:

Alison:

Uber:

EatenByAGrue:

TakeASeatOverThere:

Uber:

newfweiler:

akatherder:

snoofle:

causa:

Christopher:

Zan Lynx:

The whole system to pipe heat from the main body to the hands via fluid already exists too.

It's called "blood".

I am dead and my blood is no longer distributing heat.

What do you do now?

Throw your body on a fire to warm other people.

It is too cold to start a fire.

What do you do now?

Freeze to death.

You've been made immortal by a vampire's bite.

What do you do now?

Turn into a bat and fly to the Bahamas.

The national guard will shoot you if you get into their airspace.

What do you do now?

You're a vampire. I don't think you have to get too worried about being shot, unless they're shooting wooden stakes. Plus I doubt that the national guard of the Bahamas shoots at every bird imaginable.

Alternately, just turn back into human form and swim the rest of the way.

The national guard is on high alert for a vampire invasion, are armed with silver bullets, and have orders to fire at will on any flying object. Swimming is not possible because the distance is too far and the sun will rise before reaching shelter.

Now what do you do?

Laugh at the national guard for using silver bullets (those are for werewolves, not vampires), turn all the national guard into vampires and take over the world.

Your immortal, took over the world, outlasted everybody, and watched all the movies ever made. You're bored. What do you do now?!

Explore the universe.

The Universal Police Force has been tipped off to an immortal on Earth and have encapsulated the planet in a giant hollow unbreakable sphere.